Monday 15 June 2009
Ugly 22
My child is perfect.
Thank God, she is perfect.
She will not know what I have known. She will not bear the sins of her parents on her face.
Her name? Damn. I hadn't thought about it. I didn't know I could not bare to let her go. To give her to strangers.
Let's see.
Janis. No, she was too depressed, I don't want my baby girl to grow up depressed and lonely yet surrounded by people. That can be the worse kind of lonely. But I want her as talented.
Bobbie or Dylan. She is born on bob Dylan's birthday, really. Not Like the fake way I got the birthday. Naw, my mother probably think it was an homage to her. Heaven forbid.
Precious. Beloved Moses' wife. But I really didn't know her.
Oh so many names went through my brain. I needed st stop and just look at my baby. She will tell me.
I turn her over. Naked. Perfect. Small. And what is this between her shoulder blades? A little butterfly birth mark.
"That is only a wine port stain, she will grow out of it." The nurse says as she sees me examining her.
" I hope not. It is her freedom. He wings to fly." Just like me I thought.
"Freedom." I say. Looking at her wings.
"What?" the nurse said,thinking I was woosie from giving birth.
"Her wings, my wings it is our freedom. We are free."
I totally felt Free at that moment. I breathed out.
"FREEDOM FOREVER." I say.
"What are you going on about, child?" Carol said . Both her and Sandra were over me and the baby.
"Her name."
"Yes. what is her name, hadn't thought of one, did ya." Sandra said. Knowing full well this was more a whim but a last minute life changing decision just the same.
"I told you."
"Told us what?" Carol said trying to wrap the baby up again.
"Her name."
"In all that gibberish? Can you remind us?" Sandra helped wrapped her up. I think they were about to fight over who got to hold her first.
"Freedom Forever."
"Her name?" They said together.
"Yeah, her name is Freedom Forever."
"Who gave you the drugs before you came here?" Carol scrutinized me.
" Did you see HER birth certificate. Carol? You know she was born into a commune in San Fransisco, be glad it is only two names." Sandra winked.
"It is only two names? Right?" Carol smiled.
"Kids from hippies all way pick weird names or weird spellings." One of the nurses said to the doctor. In a whisper, like I could not hear in in this small room. "How are you spellings that dear?" she said to me.
"Oh, with 4 Ps and 8 Qs.relatively normal otherwise. I am a bit dyslexic. That is correct. right?" I said with sarcasm that could be cut with a knife.
"Are you serious?!" Some of the nurses said in unionsin
"No, stupid, F-R-E-E-D-O-M F-O-R-E-V-E-R. First name Freedom, second name Forever."
"Is Forever the father's last name or yours?" The oldest nurse inquired.
"It is her's"
"Well you can always change it later, if you think of something better." the doctor said as he signed birth certificate in such a sweet, isn't she young type tone.
Carol and Sandra fight over who gets to hold her as I fall asleep.It is over. the pain is over. The past is over.
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7 comments:
Glad you didn't go with Bobbie, for several reasons...
Freedom Forever. Yeah, it does sound like a so-called "hippie" name, but with the child's background, that's more appropriate than if she'd been named by someone who couldn't let go of the sixties.
I am glad you liked it.
She is now 16 and is finding her own streaghth. She is realizing that she has power now. Adult type power.
She has always liked symbols and referred to herself as Butterfly.
It ties back to the old woman on the Navajo reservation.
My goodness, the news is saying teens are buying morning glory seeds to get high.
They are warning kids about bad trips. The teens are all in school at this time of day. Am I suppose to pass on the message?
What's the story morning glory?
Almost forgot to mention, I like that Freedom also has a butterfly birthmark, but in a better size and location.
Thank you SF. I need to have her dream come true in a small way.
The latest chapter is up.
Wheeeeee-yewwwww! I am so far behind in the story it's pitiful. I've been building stone walls (really--not even metaphorical ones!) and dog-doctoring.
This is simply the perfect name. Simply smashing. Simply perfect. Of course, I enjoy Butterfly messing with the doctors and nurses. And, actually I think they're incorrect in their mutterings: The children of hippies often swing strongly in the other direction and give their children ordinary names.
I realize that I've been keeping my comments confined to characters lately. Just want to take a moment and say how much I enjoy your storytelling technique. It flows very naturally.
Whee! On to the next chapter!
Yeah a lot got real conservative but there was this trend in the eights to play with spellings of names instead of different names, unless you were African American then everyone had a different name.
I just put some bias in the doctor to believe that all these people where kids of the hippies, a lot of hippies settled in Vermont on the east cost.
And it does go to her growing up in a conservative Kentucky town and only identifying family with Moses family who named their daughters Hope, Faith, Love, that she named her own daughter such a strong name, Freedom.
I agree that the doctor's view was biased, and that children of hippies often go the "other way" in naming their children. Danni's choice showed her individuality. And I hadn't even made the Hope/Faith/Love connection. Now "Freedom" makes even more sense!
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